Wednesday, February 6, 2008

The Unfaithful Love Letter

I never thought someone so nice, so special … someone like YOU, would come into my life. Love, as I had experienced it, had never been this strong, so fulfilling… so true. You touched my heart in the most passionate yet the gentlest of ways, and never had I felt so loved and cared for UNTIL YOU… I knew from the very first moment I laid my eyes on you that something very wonderful will happen, and I’m so glad I made the right move. I don’t care what other people say about you, or what they think about me, and the relationship that we have. All I care about is the time when we could be together as one and never be apart ever again.

You’ve loved and lost, I know. The pain that you’ve been through is the cruelest of all, I know that too. But now I’m here, so don’t be afraid, my love, the pain that you’ve felt may be great but not incurable. My love is healing… believe and be healed by its pureness and depth. I may not be the perfect one you’ve always dreamed of… but my love is.

Some people say Valentine’s Day is just the same every year, very routinely. But not for me, because now I have you, every thing that you do and say has meaning… has life. Life has been so beautiful because of you, and I’m looking forward to spending a lifetime with you, and even beyond.

I love you. Beyond words. Beyond time. Beyond distance.

I wrote this love letter 6 years ago, it was a fine Valentine’s Day then. We were so inlove, so happy that each and every word in this letter shined with hope and truth. And at that moment, I really meant what I wrote. I never thought I could ever read this again after what I’ve done to the recipient of this letter. I’ve asked for his forgiveness far too many times and he said he had already forgiven me for every single thing that I have done. I don’t deserve it, I want him to be angry at me, even hate me. But he was not, and he did not.

You might be curious about what I’ve done to him. Well, I just fell out of love, and that’s the most painful words you could ever tell someone who loves you genuinely. I left the country to work abroad for two years and as days go by, my feelings for him slowly faded and I couldn’t seem to stop it. I guess the saying “Out of sight, out of mind” really fit huh? But inspite all that, he still tried so hard to win me back. He kept calling me and saying he’s just right there waiting for me. I feel so bad, so evil, and I started hating myself because he won’t do it for me.

Yeah he’s so damn good to be true, and someday I will definitely regret letting a fine man like him go out of my life. And I so deserve it. But after 6 years, I think it’s about time I forgive myself. I hope this blog will find its way through him, then I can finally let go and move on.

Advance Happy Valentine’s Day everyone and keep loving…

1 comment:

nicky060 said...

love ur letter there...